Hi little humans!
Name is Alan Euclide, but in the multiverse people just call me "The Weirdo".
*Dimensional travels can drive you crazy*.
(The Dimensional traveler of Gravity Falls)
i’m ok. if ok mean still existing.
My little sister come to my room last night, and.. nevermind
I feel deeply angst, depressed, i’m hungry but i don’t want to eat, my body feel like lead.
but don’t worry!, i’ve feeling this way for years.
Believe me when i say - i’ve done absolutely everything to try to feel better- but is useless. The best i can do is ignore my brain enough, lie to myself saying that everything is ok.
but is not, will never be ok.
This world will never change, this no-sense will never disappear as the enormous void in my chest and deep sadness in my brain.
What’s the point of keep breathing if i don’t have dreams, goals or reasons which can convince me?
No one never understand. Everyone see life like something wonderful, is like if no one can see the absurdity, feel the void, think enough to see that all their life, plans and goals are bullshit, are nothing but pathetic excuses - That everyone of us are just slaves -
Why you all always trying to keep others alive?,
You wait they become as stupid enough to find a lie wich convince them?.
- …Money, Jesus, Love…
i don’t want to take 20 pill at day to feel that everything is fine. …….and no one understand…..
You act like those anti-abort who gives a fuck how a baby/person live/feel instead they still alive.
I don’t want to RP anymore.
Outside the Wall - Pink Floyd
All alone, or in two’s,
the ones who really love you
walk up and down outside the wall.
some hand in hand
and some gathered together in bands.
the bleeding hearts and artists
make their stand.
And when they’ve given you their all
some stagger and fall, after all it’s not easy
banging your heart against some mad bugger’s wall.
"isn’t this where…."
FUCK THE REVOLUTION.
humans don’t deserve salvation.
The Trial - Pink Floyd
The trial. 1 song left. now is when i must think more deeply.
Look up. See the stars. Understand the time. Understand the million an billion of years of that enormous mass of doubtly function pass creating matter, suns, plantes and destroy them in secconds, think about the earth, this pale blue dot.
Where a little self-consious monkey try to understand “why” is it here.
And there is no answers, and they create religion, money, drugs and other lies to keep their poor minds away from something obvious.
There is no trassendence, there is no übermench either, the finallity is an illusion. We live in a pointless illusion
And that’s not something bad, not at all! be pointless is one of the most pure understandings of freedom.
We should pass the rest of our illusory lives enjoying drugs, sex and drown in the pleasures of this luckly existence
. BUT NO! we’re stupid enought to create a sistem to keep everyone distracted in BULLSHIT instead be free and enjoy the perfect illusion.
And we’re forced to follow that lie. AND CLAME THE LIE IS A TRUTH! AND KILL FOR THE LIE! AND KILL THIS PLANET FOR THAT LIE!
Pink Floyd - The Show Must Go On
I’m depressed because my brain works that way, i’ve endogenous depression.
i feel depressed because life is absolutely pointless, and I simply can not lie myself with the dreamy-social-friendly bullshit based on how much money or void illusions of smiling/slavery, fairy tale love stories you can follow at the same time.
What’s the point of living lying to yourself?
i can’t even feel pleasure about nothing, i’m not feeling awake, just when i’m high, or absurdly drunk is when i feel real, in my original state, a bunch of assumed nothing.
Not an hypocrit-social-mask
Is funny you mention that, because i did exactly the same since i was 12.
i’ve been filled almost 1000 notebooks and carpets with papers, i wrote at least 200 suicide notes in my life .
Maybe if i go to sleep now i can ignore this feeling enought to don’t finish whit this no-sense today, but eventually, it have to happen.